Abuse survivor

This category contains 20 posts

Five years after “Not Guilty”

It is hard to believe that March 10, 2015 is the five year anniversary of my not guilty verdict. It is so hard to look back and fathom what that time was like. First, in 2007, I was arrested for a murder I didn’t commit. Then I waited three long years, with an ankle bracelet on, for the trial to … Continue reading

Why the Kansas school spanking bill is wrong

Recently I read about a bill in Kansas which will allow spanking children in schools. Teachers and caregivers will have the right to spank a child up to ten times, so hard that it could leave bruising and redness on the child. I want to know why any politician thinks that this should be a … Continue reading

I chose to be gay

If you’ve read my book, Fear of Our Father—a true story of abuse, murder and family ties, then you know that I am openly gay. You will have read that I chose to be in a romantic relationship with another woman because of the sexual abuse inflicted upon me by my father, and that I’m … Continue reading

Child Abuse Awareness month

Well another month has come and for many the weather is improving. For many victims of abuse, the winter months bring more and more abuse. The weather, the holidays, whatever the excuse may be for the moment. Springtime brings a new peace for some, yet it only lasts for a short time. For my family, … Continue reading

Three years after the verdict: birthdays, books and TV shows

This month is one of happiness and yet so much pain and turmoil for me. It is happy because on March 12, 2010 the jury came back with the Not Guilty verdict in my murder trial. On the other hand, this month, my mom would have turned 75 if she hadn’t been killed in 2003. … Continue reading

Life after abuse holds hope for the future

Thank God I finally got a job after almost a year of dealing with background checks and suspicious employers. I can’t say I blame them–with so many people desperate for work to choose from–for passing on an applicant with a murder charge on her record, but most of them overlooked the “Not Guilty” outcome and … Continue reading

Healing for the Holidays

Wow, this year has gone by so quickly. Before I reminisce on my year, I want to take a moment to talk about the senseless killings that took place at Sandy Hook. I am saddened for these families and hope that with time, courage, help, and their faith that this holiday sees them finding a … Continue reading

Perceptions and assumptions

The past few months there is a word–no, actually two words–that have been bothering me: perception and assumption. These words can cause a person’s entire life to be changed forever. I recently heard of an innocent man, Michael Morton, who spent 20 years in prison for the murder of his wife because of perceptions and … Continue reading

Child bride or abused child–same thing

I related to a recent article on children in other countries being forced to marry and obey much older men. The headline read: The terrifying world of child brides: Devastating images show girls young enough to be in pre-school who are married off to older men  This disgusts many Americans and we don’t understand why … Continue reading

Speaking out, and a month of memories

September. My, where has the year gone? This month always brings back the memory of my mom’s disappearance on September 11, 2003, and the beginning of the web of stories that my brother wove. First, he said that he killed both of our parents, then he said that I did, then he said he didn’t … Continue reading